Complicated Heart
by Asagi Tsuki
Summary: It all started one day before the captain's leave. (songfic)


Complicated Heart 

By: Asagi Tsuki

A songfic again. I seem to be making many songfics lately. And now I am going to make more songfics based on old songs. They're good, and the lyrics are supporting.

This song is sung by Michael Learns to Rock, and if there's any mistakes in the lyric, feel free to tell me.

Rating: PG for safety

Pairing: TezuFuji

Genre: romance with a bit of angst, but not really since I'm a sucker in making angsty stories

Warning: shounen ai and probable OOCness, and don't forget probable sap

Disclaimer: I don't own both Tenisu no Oujisama and the song

**I don't know how to handle a complicated heart**

One day right after they win their match against Hyoutei Gakuen in the Prefectural Tournament, all the regulars of the Seishun Gakuen tennis club gathered in the park at night to prepare to hike the hill nearby. They were going to watch the sunrise together that day.

But little did they knew, that their gathering together was going to be their last gathering together, for the captain brought a surprising news the day after that day.

--------------------

"I will go to Germany to treat my left shoulder," the captain of the tennis club announced with his flat and monotonous voice. He was as stoic and as expressionless as ever.

The others could only look at him wide-eyed, disbelieving their hearing sense. Even the youngest and cockiest member of the regulars who was playing with his tennis ball dropped it as he was shocked when he heard the announcement, the sudden announcement to be exact.

"W- why so sudden, Tezuka?" a redhead stuttered. They were always depending on their captain, and if he went away, they didn't know whom they should depend on.

"Yesterday Sakaki-san and offered it to Ryuuzaki-sensei, and now she offered the treatment to me," he answered lightly, studying each expressions his teammates wore on their face. Even Fuji, who usually smiles all day, looked shocked.

"Is there any questions about this issue?" he asked again, and when the others gave no response, he sighed, and dismissed the club's afternoon practice. "The practice time is over, get home now!" he commanded.

Don't know what to say now 

_Don't know where to start_

_I don't know how to handle_

_A complicated heart_

They walked to the changing room of the boys' tennis club in silent. Actually, they had loads and loads of questions they wanted to ask about the issue, but they didn't know how to ask them.

Especially Fuji.

He really wanted to disagree Tezuka's decision in going to Germany, because he knew that Germany is not near. Japan and Germany were even located in different continents. But he didn't know how to sound his protest, so he kept silent. He could only keep silent.

He changed his tennis shirt with his school uniform, took his tennis bag and walked out of the changing room silently, leaving his teammates all looking at him silently, because they knew how it felt to be left by the one you cared the most. They knew how much it hurt to be left by the one you cared the most.

You tell me you are leaving 

_And I just have to say_

_Before you throw it all away_

After he got out of the changing room, he quickly searched for the captain of his. He was standing in front of the faculty room after talking about his leave for Germany in advance with Ryuuzaki-sensei.

"Tezuka," he called out softly.

"Fuji? What are you doing here?" Tezuka asked as he looked at who had called him. "You go home first, I can't walk you home today, sorry," he continued.

Fuji only shook his head slowly. It wasn't what he wanted to talk about anyway.

"So what do you want to talk about?" Tezuka asked as he frowned a bit and watched the tennis prodigy intently.

Even if you want to go alone 

_I will be waiting when you're coming home_

_If you need someone to ease the pain_

_You can lean on me, my love will still remain_

"May I go with you?" he asked nervously. He knew exactly what the answer would be, 'no'. He could say that it was as expected from their stoic and strict captain.

"Gomen Fuji, I wanted to ask you to go with me too, actually, but I can't, you have to stay here and win all the matches up to the Nationals," he answered with deep yet affectionate voice.

"I know that would be your answer," Fuji murmured as soft as he can, "It's okay, I will win all the matches for sure, and I will open the way for you to the Nationals," he replied as he forced a smile.

"I'm sorry Fuji, please understand," Tezuka mumbled with a sad tone.

"I know, don't worry," he replied again, not letting his forced smile disappear from his face for even one second. Many people said that he acted like Mona Lisa who always smiles even when she is sad.

Don't know what you're thinking 

_To me it seems quite tough_

_To hold a conversation_

_When words are not enough_

"Is there anything you wanted to talk about anymore?" Tezuka asked unsurely. He knew that Fuji was sad at that time, but he didn't want his smile to disappear from his face for even one second. What was his purpose in keeping his forced smile in place, anyway? That would only hurt himself more, and hurt him more.

He didn't want to see Fuji with his forced smile. He wanted to see Fuji with his genuine smile. And it hurt every time he saw Fuji with his forced smile, and it hurt more when the one who made him place that forced smile of his was him.

"Ah, no, nothing more," Fuji answered hurriedly. "But you're sure that you wanted to go there, right, for if you weren't sure, I would never forgive you," he stated jokingly as he let out a small laugh escaped his lips.

"Yes, I'm sure," Tezuka answered as he nodded his head. He's sure that he wanted to go to Germany to do some treatments to his left shoulder. He didn't want his left shoulder to be a burden for his family, for his teammates, for his schoolmates, and for Fuji.

So this is your decision 

_And there's nothing I can do_

_I can only say to you_

_Even if you want to go alone_

_I will be waiting when you're coming home_

_If you need someone to ease the pain_

_You can lean on me, my love will still remain_

"Very well, if you are really sure, there is nothing I can do," Fuji mumbled, "But I will always wait for your return, don't forget that," he continued.

"I will never forget that, so please wait for me, I will certainly return here, to you," Tezuka stated as he tried to reassure Fuji that he would certainly go back home. They were lovers, even though they're not officially lovers, but they're still lovers.

"Okay then, see you tomorrow," Fuji said as he bid him goodbye and waved at him a bit, before running towards the front gate of their school.

Tezuka could only waved his hand back and saw the slender figure of the tennis prodigy disappeared in the distance.

--------------------

The next day….

"Ne, Tezuka, where's Fuji?" a raven haired boy asked as he looked around the changing room in search of the beautiful tennis prodigy, but he found no trace of the prodigy. He was called the mother hen of Seigaku not for nothing, and it was proved at that time because he started to become panicked when he found no trace of the prodigy.

"He didn't come?" Tezuka asked back confusedly. He was the first one to arrive at the changing room at every afternoon practice usually, so why not now?

"You don't know?" Oishi asked back confusedly. Usually, whatever happened to Fuji, Tezuka was the first one to know. So why not now too?

"No, he didn't say anything to me," Tezuka answered as he frowned. His frown deepened when he remembered that Fuji had been avoiding him since the morning practice. Every time they meet each other, he would only smile politely before walking off somewhere else.

He also didn't answer to every question Tezuka asked. He would only smile, and left him just like that without answering his question, like he was avoiding him on purpose.

"What happened between you two?" Oishi asked worriedly.

"I don't really know," Tezuka answered as he shrugged slightly. He would try calling Fuji later that day after the afternoon practice was over.

--------------------

Later that night….

"Moshi moshi, this is Fuji residence," a woman's voice could be heard from the other line of the phone.

"Moshi moshi, could I talk to Shuusuke?" Tezuka asked, remembering that it would be inappropriate if he said that he wanted to talk to Fuji, since everyone in the household are Fuji.

"Could I know who you are?" the voice asked, and now he was sure that it was Fuji's older sister whose name is Yumiko.

"His friend, Tezuka," he answered shortly and effectively.

The phone was placed just like that on the end table near the phone, and after some time, the same person picked up the phone again. "Gomen ne, Tezuka-kun, but Shuusuke said he didn't want to answer your phone, I didn't really know why, though, I'm really sorry," she said.

"Oh, it's okay," Tezuka replied seconds later after he heard what Yumiko told him. What's the matter with Fuji? It's really clear that he _was_ avoiding him.

"Do you want to leave a message or two?" Yumiko offered.

"Ah, please tell him that I will be leaving tomorrow morning at nine o'clock," he answered politely before he finally hung the telephone up.

"Fuji…." He murmured slowly as he stared at the little black yet elegant phone that was placed on the end table in front of him.

--------------------

Meanwhile, at the Fuji residence….

"Shuusuke, what's the matter with you? Your friend called you but you didn't want to answer it, it's so rude," Yumiko shouted from outside of his room while she knocked on the door, well, that's if you could call it 'knock' since it was more likely that she banged the door.

"Nothing's wrong," he replied from inside of his room. He was lying on his bed while hugging his pillow. In front of him, there lied a small photo frame that contained a photo of himself, Tezuka, Saeki and Yuuta.

"Oh yeah, he asked me to tell you that he is leaving tomorrow at nine o'clock in the morning, where is he leaving to, anyways?" she informed and at the same time asked.

"Tomorrow morning at nine o'clock…. Thank you for the information, Yumiko nee-san," he replied again, and he kept silent after that, not heeding any of his sister's questions.

--------------------

The next day at the Narita airport….

"Take good care of yourself there," Ryuuzaki-sensei said as she stood before her student. She was standing beside Oishi who also came to see Tezuka leave.

"Yeah, you definitely have to come back to lead our team once again later, so now you only have to concentrate in healing your left shoulder completely," he lectured as he smiled reassuringly towards Tezuka.

"I know," he replied as he nodded curtly.

"You didn't need to worry about us here, just go on through the treatment, we promise that when you come back later, the path to the Nationals will be wide open in front of your eyes," he stated again.

"I know, I believed in you all," he replied again.

A girl's voice was heard through all the speakers in the airport, announcing the arrival of the plane from Germany, which was going to leave for Germany again shortly after.

"All passengers, please enter the waiting room and prepare to board the plane," the girl's voice spoke. Her voice was a bit vague because it was heard from the speakers.

Tezuka fell silent for a while, he looked around, and sighed. "I'm going now," he said to Ryuuzaki-sensei and to Oishi.

"The others couldn't come because they're busy with the club activity today," Oishi explained as he saw Tezuka looked around, like he was searching for something, or someone.

"Oh, okay then," he replied again and he took his baggage, then walked towards the waiting room for the international flight to Germany.

When he was about to enter the waiting room, however, he heard a sound he knew so well called out his name. A voice that he knew so well.

"TEZUKA!" a boy shouted from the exit door of the ariport.

Tezuka turned to see who called him, even though he already knew whom it was who called him. It was Fuji, because he recognized his voice so well that he couldn't have mistaken it for someone else's voice.

Fuji stood still there, as if asking Tezuka to cancel his plan in leaving to Germany, and went out of the ariport with him. But, when he heard the girl's voice announcing the arrival and the departure of the international flight to Germany for the third time, he turned around and prepared to enter the room.

Fuji who saw that felt very sad, but he knew it was for the best. He approached Tezuka right before he entered the waiting room.

If this is your decision 

_And there's nothing I can do_

_I can only say to you_

_Even if you want to go alone_

_I will be waiting when you're coming home_

_If you need someone to ease the pain_

_You can lean on me, my love will still remain_

_Even if you want to go alone_

_I will still love you when tomorrow comes_

_If you need someone to ease the pain_

_You can lean on me, my love will still remain_

He hugged Tezuka from behind, and stayed still until the girl's voice who announced the arrival and the departure of the international flight was heard through the speakers for the fourth time.

"Promise me, you'll definitely come back, because I will always wait for you here," his voice was muffled by Tezuka's shirt.

"I promise, I will definitely come back, for you," Tezuka answered, trying to convince his unofficial lover for the nth time. He felt happy that Fuji came to see him leave at least. He almost cancelled his departure to Germany because Fuji didn't come, and he didn't want to leave him just like that.

Even though they were unofficial lovers, it didn't really matter. What really mattered were their feelings.

After the girl's voice announced the arrival and the departure of the international flight to Germany for the seventh time, Fuji let go of Tezuka.

"Go, or you'll miss the plane," Fuji warned jokingly as he smiled.

"Okay, I've promised that I will go home, and now it's your turn to promise that you'll wait for me no matter what," Tezuka asked as he studied Fuji's face for the last time.

"Heh, even if you didn't ask for it, I will definitely wait for you return, no matter what," Fuji replied as he chuckled a bit.

Tezuka brushed away a few strands of chocolate brown hair from Fuji's face and kissed his forehead, before advancing further in giving him a peck on his lips.

It was their first kiss in their two years and three months relationship. It was chaste and quick, yet the taste lingered for a longer time than the kiss itself.

He gave him a dolphin keychain that was made of crystal. "Keep this for me, this is the symbol of our promises," he stated. "And I'll continue _it_ later when I come home,"

"I understand, I will take good care of it, and I will keep my promise," Fuji replied as he took the keychain from Tezuka's hand and grasped it in his right hand, totally ignoring the pain the keychain gave him.

"I'm going first," Tezuka said monotonously, and he entered the waiting room and the bridge that connected the plane with the airport itself.

"I will definitely wait for your return, no matter what," Fuji murmured to himself as he watch the figure of his lover disappeared when he entered the bridge that connected the plane with the airport.

He brought up his hand and touched his lips. He smiled, and watched the plane took off, flying high to the sky, until it finally couldn't be seen bare-eyed.

**My love will still remain**

Finally finished! What do you think? Is it good or bad? Comments and reviews are welcomed!

Please help me improve my ability in making songfics, since I think I will be making many more songfics later.

Please leave a review so that I can know what you think about this story.


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